Looking for a way to add some humor to your next cocktail party or gathering? Look no further than these 100+ alcohol puns that are guaranteed to put a smile on your face and a laugh in your belly. Whether you’re a seasoned party-goer or a casual drinker, these puns are sure to be a hit.
So let’s raise a glass and dive into this hilarious list of alcohol puns!
What are Alcohol Puns?
Alcohol puns are a form of wordplay that use the names of different types of alcohol or drink-related phrases to create witty and humorous statements. Often alcohol puns involve turning a phrase on its head to create a new meaning that is both clever and amusing.
One Liner Alcohol Puns
- I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right. Sip.
- “Wine” not join us for a drink?
- I’m a wine-derful person.
- Wine not?
- Wine a little, laugh a lot.
- I made a pour decision.
- I’m not a wine snob. I’m a wine sipper.
- I’m not drinking to forget my problems, I’m drinking to summon the courage to punch them in the face.
- I’m not an alcoholic. I’m a wine enthusiast.
- Champagne is always the answer.
- I drink beer because I hate myself, but tequila makes me love myself.
- I like my whiskey how I like my men: aged 18 years and locked in a barrel.
- I drink to make other people more interesting.
- I always have a bottle of wine ready for emergencies. Like when I’m thirsty.
- I can’t even think straight, I need a drink just to concentrate.
- I’m not drunk, I’m just chemically happy.
- Alcohol, because no good story starts with someone eating a salad.
- I’m not day drinking, I’m just on Australian time.
- I didn’t text you, vodka did.
- Bourbon, because sometimes beer just isn’t going to cut it.
- I never trust a skinny bartender.
- I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis.
- I’m not drinking to drown my sorrows, I’m just teaching them how to swim.
- I’ve never met a wine that I didn’t like.
- I don’t always drink, but when I do, I prefer tequila.
- I drink to forget that I’m getting older, but then I forget to stop drinking.
- Friends don’t let friends drink late-night pinot noir.
- Don’t cry over spilled wine, just refill your glass instead.
Witty Alcohol Puns
- Vodka is like water, but with better marketing.
- Friends don’t let friends drink boxed wine.
- I drink champagne when I’m happy and when I’m sad. Sometimes I drink it when I’m alone. When I have company, I consider it obligatory. I trifle with it if I’m not hungry and drink it when I am. Otherwise, I never touch it- unless I’m thirsty.
- Friends don’t let friends drink bad wine.
- Everyone needs a beverage buddy.
- I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a wine taster. The more you know.
- Any pizza can be a personal pizza if you try hard enough and believe in yourself … and drink enough tequila.
- I drink and I know things.
- I’m not sure if I have enough wine to make it through the week, but I’m willing to try.
- Why limit happy hour to just one hour?
- I’d agree to any type of shot as long as it’s not a shot in the dark.
- Wine lovers have more grape expectations.
- If wine is fruit, then vodka is a vegetable.
- If drinking is interfering with your work, try drinking after work.
- I’m not drinking too much, I’m just following the advice on my shirt.
- Beer is the reason why I get out of bed every afternoon.
- The only thing I throw back faster than shots is a two-for-one happy hour deal.
- I drink Champagne when I win, to celebrate… and I drink Champagne when I lose, to console myself.
- Not all heroes wear capes, some just hold bottles of beer and/or shot glasses.
- Wine may not solve your problems, but neither will water.
- I have a great memory. It’s just short.
- My boss told me to have a good day… so I went to happy hour.
- Stay Stay classy, sassy, and a bit badassy with your drink in hand.
Short Alcohol Puns
- You drink too much, you cuss too much, and you have questionable morals… You sound like my kind of people.
- I’d give up wine, but I’m not a quitter.
- Sometimes you have to drink a little to get through a lot.
- Vodka is like snowflakes, they’re all unique but they will all mess you up.
- I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a professional drinker.
- Cheers to the nights that turned into mornings and the friends who turned into family.
- I’m not shouting, I’m just overly excited… because there’s tequila involved.
- I’m not sure if it’s the wine talking or just me being hilarious.
- I drink to forget that tomorrow is Monday.
- When in doubt, drink tequila and dance on tables.
- I love alcohol like Kanye loves Kanye.
- Working nine to wine.
- Everything happens for a riesling.
- A bottle of wine a day keeps the doctor away… or at least his boredom.
- Tequila mockingbird.
- Too much of anything is bad, but too much champagne is just right.
- Where there’s a wine, there’s a way.
- Some days you just need a bottle of wine and your couch.
- Always keep a bottle of wine in the fridge for special occasions, like Wednesday.
- Drink ’till you’re a Gallagher.
- I can’t adult today… I need a bubble bath and a glass of champagne.
- Life is too short to drink bad wine.
- You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy wine, and that’s kind of the same thing.
- A party without champagne is just a meeting.
- Screw it, let’s do it.
- Not all girls are made of sugar, spice, and everything nice… Some girls are made of whiskey, ice, and everything nice.
- You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.
- More wine, less whine.
- I solemnly swear that I am up to no good… except for when I’m drinking wine, then I’m probably just up to some mischief.
- A sip of wine a day keeps the doctor away.
- Drink like a fish… swim like a mermaid.
- Friends don’t let friends drink alone.
- Wine improves with age, I improve with wine.
- I’m a professional drinker – I can do it with my eyes closed.
- I’ve never met a beer I didn’t like.
Weird Alcohol Puns
- A little bit of alcohol never hurt anyone… Except when you fall down the stairs on the way home.
- I can’t think of a better way to start the day than with a mimosa.
- When life gives you lemons, trade them for limes and have a margarita.
- Just one drink… said no one ever.
- All I really need is some sunshine and a cold drink.
- If at first you don’t succeed, have a beer and try again.
- I’m not drinking alone, I’m social distancing from my problems.
- Life is short, drink the good wine.
- A balanced diet is a glass of wine in each hand.
- If you can’t drink to forget, drink to remember.
- Drinking alcohol never solves anything… But neither does drinking milk.
- Don’t judge me until you’ve walked a mile in my shoes… and drank a bottle of my wine.
- Beer, because sometimes one’s WiFi just isn’t working.
- Always remember, it’s not drinking alone if your dog is with you.
In summary, incorporating alcohol puns into your next social gathering or event can be a great way to add some humor and break the ice with your friends and family. Whether you prefer wine, beer, or spirits, there’s sure to be a pun that will elicit a smile or a laugh.
In addition to being funny, alcohol puns are a great way to show off your creativity and linguistic skills. By playing around with words and phrases related to your favorite drinks, you can come up with some truly clever and amusing expressions that will make you the life of the party.
So next time you crack open a bottle or pour yourself a drink, why not try out one of these alcohol puns and see if it doesn’t bring a smile to your face? Cheers to laughter and good times!